Friday, May 28, 2010

the weekend came early...

Well yesterday was a good day. My very stressed-out husband finally completed his last eight papers and seven exams later, he is done. We went out together for a celebratory lunch, and then headed a few hours north to catch a gig that our friend played at in Lisburn. It was not the most nutritionally sound day I've ever had - as soon as I am separated from my usual routines and plans it becomes difficult either to make positive choices or as happened last night, find positive options!

Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1 slice wholewheat toast.
Celebratory Lunch: Half a starter portion of nachos, followed by just over half a main course portion of very spicy chilli con carne, which was topped with chopped peppers, onions, scallions, tomatoes and cheese and served with corn salad (all of which I ate) and Mexican rice (I ate one tablespoon) and refried beans (which I did not eat, because they resemble poo).
Snack: Cup of Butlers hot chocolate.
Dinner: Half a portion of chips!
Snacks at the gig: 2 cups of coffee, 2 rice krispie chocolate squares, a handful of marshmallows dipped in chocolate.

I have hives all over the place, presumably from all the sugar in the afternoon and evening. scratchyscratch

The Husband Unit is now away for a few days for a stag (that's bachelor to the US readers) party where they are canoeing out to a small island for some barbecuing, drinking, swimming, hiking etc. It sounds so good that I wish I were going. Meanwhile here I have a party to go to tonight (and another tomorrow night) and two friends flying in from the UK for the next four days. Lots of things to look forward to, and lots of things to do to get ready. And yet here I sit in my pyjamas at lunch time, drinking coffee...

Edit: I forgot to add that I will be starting therapy with an eating distress therapist one-on-one next week, as well as Group Therapy. This won't be the first bout of counselling I've ever engaged in but it will be the first time I have ever talked with a professional about what's really going on with me in terms of the eating disorder. I am very anxious about all the layers of complexity being uncovered, but I am choosing to trust these far the support from the clinic has been invaluable. I also have an appointment with the nutritionist the following week, and I am just as nervous about that. As I was explaining to a friend last night, I feel like I am finally understanding what it is to eat well for my body without dieting and I am so concerned that there will be a list of "dos and don'ts" from this nutritionist that might re-awaken the sleeping diet mentality in me...but my fears are ridiculous, because this nutritionist is a specialist with eating distress and she will already know in advance how insane my food-related thinking is! So, yes. I thought I'd divulge that. I'll let you know how I get on.

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