felicitations to me

Greetings, skinny earthlings.

Today my desire to overeat whirred in the background like a white noise cd, without ever quite reaching full volume. It did cross my mind at one point when I was passing a shop to go in and get a bar of chocolate (no-one would know...one bar won't affect your weight...and other assorted lies), but then I thought about confessing that here. And then I thought about lying about it here. Neither option seemed like a good one, so I opted out of the chocolate.

I walked for a couple of hours again today. The sun was shining, the sky was blue(ish) and my companion was a cheery twenty-month old full of chatter and observations about everything we saw.

I ate a bit more than I wanted to today.

Breakfast: Spiced pumpkin oats, again. (My squash stash is gone now, so that'll be the last one for a while.)

Snack I: This is the problem bit. Breakfast was at 8am, but by 11am I was quite hungry (genuine hunger today rather than emotional hunger). I was heading out for a long walk and I knew it would be a couple of hours til lunch, so I ate a slice of seeded bread with a some ham and a slice of cheese. It filled the gap but it was more like a meal than a snack.

Lunch: Chicken caesar bagel with rocket and red peppers.

Snack II: A tangerine.

Dinner: We had friends over, so I made pizza, pasta and salad. I usually avoid such meals when I am "on a diet" but I really desire to be balanced, and these foods fit perfectly well in a balanced diet, in moderation. I made three pizzas - chorizo and sweetcorn, ham and mushroom and a loaded one with all of the above, plus green peppers. I made pesto pasta and a creamy tomato pasta. I ate two slices of pizza, 1 tablespoon each of the pastas, and a large mixed salad. It was great.

I knew I would be tempted to binge on the pizza tonight, so it was a bit of a test. The test was less about the quantity I ate and more about my emotions surrounding the meal. I did a little stimulus control, placing the pizza on the counter behind me buffet style so you'd have to get up to get more food. This was helpful. I was really content with the amount I ate and have decided to give myself credit for a little victory. Well done me.

Yes, that's right, I am now a saddo who will now regularly congratulate myself for the smallest things. Seriously. So get used to it waifs! *waves fist threateningly*