sun-day

Breakfast: Granola and natural yoghurt.

Lunch (BBQ): 1 burger in a bun with cheese, lettuce and onions, 1 regular sausage on a slice of French bread with onions and ketchup, 1 Bratwurst sausage on 2 slices of French bread with ketchup, half of a marinated pork kebab, 1 glass of 7-up.

Evening: 2 bites of banana and a handful of grapes.

It was another beautiful day; not quite as sunny but beautiful, warm and dry nonetheless. I cycled everywhere. I'm still crapping myself (not literally you understand), and my arse hurts a lot, but I'm enjoying it.

The husband unit and I ate a small breakfast at 9am. Lunch was at 2pm, and I was absolutely ravenous. I ate far too much and spent the afternoon feeling ill, bloated and regretful.

I struggle to write in-depth here about the emotional battles of ED. I don't even know if I can do it now. But I decided today, while having a late afternoon "nap" that I would use the BBQ as a learning experience. When I am very hungry, I should eat one thing and pause for ten minutes. If I find I am still hungry, I can eat a serving of something else. I do not need to leap in and grab as much as possible as fast as possible. What I did today was not emotional eating, it was habitual. I stuffed myself because I was extremely hungry, and did not listen to the signals of my body telling me that it had had enough, long before I stopped eating. As a result I felt ill and worse, regretful. Every incidence of over-eating acts like a trigger for me.

Anyway, new dawn new day and all that.

cyclelogical

So we took our freshly serviced as-yet-unridden bicycles from the shed on this gloriously sunny day and set off for Kevin's sister's house. We quickly realised that my tyres were completely flat. This is very angering, because I paid €25 to a guy to service the whole bike which includes, you know, putting air in the tyres and basically...nothing else. Grr! I'm going down there on Monday to fight with them for handing my bike back to me, charging me buttloads of cash and doing absolutely nothing to it. I demand a recount. I mean refund.

After a lot of effort, we figured out how to pump up the tyres. The difficulty is that it is a vintage bike and doesn't have standard fittings. The husband unit was stellar. After 30 minutes of frustration, we were finally ready to go.

I cannot emphasise enough how nerve-wracking it is at 247lbs and having not been on a bicycle for 15 years to get out into traffic, but I did it. It was a little wobbly and my steering was terrible, but we got there. Also my shoes kept threatening to come off. In the moments where my little heart wasn't still with terror, I even quite enjoyed it. The sun, the freedom, the wind whipping in my hair...I think I'm going to enjoy this! We're planning another short adventure tomorrow to church.

For lunch I ate: 1 slice of ham, 1 slice of turkey, 1 tablespoon of some kind of Greek chicken dish, 1 chicken nugget, 1 slice of garlic bread and 2 tablespoons of tomatoey pasta. No vegetables! There was a green salad but it was literally drenched in dressing, and I like my dressings sparse. For dessert I went for the lightest option - pavlova (for the non-Europeans, that's meringue with cream and fruit). In this case, there was no fruit on top, but lemon curd and almonds instead. It was extremely sweet and I didn't really enjoy it, but I kept eating. I don't even know why. I also had a slice of Malteaser cake - 1/16th of the whole thing. This was also too sweet and dense. I am losing my sweet tooth!

For dinner we went as planned to a new Mexican place. I think it was a chain restaurant actually - Cactus Jacks? It was good. I wasn't too hungry so I just had a starter of tortilla chips with chilli, salsa and sour cream. It was delicious, but I only managed half of it.

bed nw slepy asdb

fall schmall

Ta an ghrian ag taitneamh go hard sa spéir inniú! The sun is shining brightly in the sky today. We're planning to bike over to my husband's sister's house for her daughter's birthday party today. It's not far, but I haven't been on a bike in 15 years, and the chances of falling on my face repeatedly are very high indeed.

I'm looking forward to it though. A friend bequeathed her bicycle to me when she left the country recently. I had it serviced and the saddle replaced. It's a girl's dream...basket, ribbons, a bell... never what I would have gone for but it is so pretty. I plan to attach square wheels and cycle over mountains at sunset to the amazement of villagers below.

Planned food:

Late breakfast: Cinnamon and raisin bagel, with some peanut butter and a sliced banana.

Lunch: Party-food...knowing my sister-in-law, there'll be two feasts; one for the littlers and one for us. Ours will probably be something very lavish and exotic, and lots of it, as well as mounds of rice and salads, and ten kinds of desserts. She doesn't do things by halves.

Dinner: Date-night. We're going out. To do what has not yet been decided, but we're thinking of going to one of the new Mexican restaurants in the Italian quarter in town. I'll try not to feel too guilty for abandoning our usual Mexican haunt, where we have been eating for twelve glorious years. ¡Ay, caramba!

So, it's mostly variables. I'm going to enjoy whatever I have, and just try to watch my portion sizes.